A redneck gets married and on his wedding night finds his bride in the sexiest piece of lingerie he’s ever laid eyes on.
She looks at him and says “I want you to know that you’ll be my first and only man.”
The redneck quickly re-dresses and angrily grabs his wife and throws her in the truck and drops her off at her parents home.
A few minutes later his father calls and asks what’s the matter to which the redneck replied.
” If she ain’t good enough for her own family she ain’t good enough for mine!”
Redneck Man Shocks People at a Pool Party When He Wrestled a Gator
A filthy rich Florida man invites all of his friends and neighbors to a party around the pool in the backyard of his mansion. He also invites Leroy, the only redneck in the neighborhood. Leroy was having a good time drinking, dancing, eating BBQ, and flirting with all the women.
There was a 10-foot long alligator in the pool and after a few hours of partying the host announced, “I’ll give a million dollars to anyone who has the nerve to jump in the pool.” The words were barely out of his mouth when there was a loud splash. Everyone turned around and Leroy was in the pool!
Leroy was fighting the gator and the water was churning and splashing everywhere. Leroy was jabbing it in the eyes with his thumbs, punching it, and attempting to strangle it. He finally succeeded and left it floating in the water as he slowly climbed out of the pool. The onlookers were staring at him in disbelief.
Finally, the host says, “Well Leroy, I guess I owe you a million dollars.”
“No, that’s okay. I don’t want it,” says Leroy.
The rich man says, “I have to give you something, you won the bet. How about half a million bucks?”
Leroy says, “No thanks, I don’t want it.”
The host says, “I insist on giving you something. How about a new Porsche, a Rolex, and some stock options?”
Again Leroy declines.
Confused, the man asks him, “Well, Leroy, then what do you want?”
Leroy says, “What I want is the name of the sumbitch who pushed me in the pool!”